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Decoys DVD Review

Decoys

November 11, 2004

Director: Matthew Hastings,
Starring: Corey Sevier, Stefanie von Pfetten, Kim Poirier, Elias Toufexis, Meghan Ory, Enis Esmer, Krista Morin, Marc Trottier, Carrie Colak, Richard Burgi, Nicole Eggert, Don Hastings, Sarah Smyth, Leah Graham, Mike Lobel, ,

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DVD Review

Decoys is the story of one young man’s discovery of a female alien race that has infiltrated his University campus. Luke Callahan is the young man in question, and he is charmed when two busty blondes flirt with him in his dorm’s laundry room. But then he discovers the shocking truth that these gorgeous women are in fact extra-terrestrials. It’s then a race against time to save his campus, his friends and even himself from seductive and, ultimately, death.

The opening of the film has a classic, predictable horror-movie feel to it. A young man goes creeping around an empty, seemingly, deserted house and gets a shock when he discovers two dead bodies. All the classic horror-movie conventions are used; creepy, suspense-building music, the wind whistling outside, creaky floorboards; they’re all used. Also, within the first 10 minutes, I get the feeling that this film is more for the testosterone induced amongst us! Female nudity, sexual innuendo’s and full on sexual acts all present. This film’s main themes are obvious and clear from the start – sex, sex and more sex! I would say this film’s story could be verging on pornographic if not for the lack of graphic detail and sex scenes.

I will say, though, there is some mystery and intrigue in regards to the aliens themselves. And there is the classic, rather cliché, idea of Luke having a murder pinned on him and, of course, him being the innocent party in all this. Another, seemingly cliché, idea is Luke’s friend being hopelessly in love with him and of course Luke is blind to it and has no idea! The storyline is verging on cheesy as we speak!

The acting is of poor quality, especially from the blonde bimbos/slimy aliens themselves. You can tell this film is aimed more at the males, as most of the women in it are attractive, blonde, have big breasts and incredible bodies! The storyline unfolds even more and the cheese is sprinkled on more liberally!

One upside is the music used, very catchy and played on it’s own, on a soundtrack maybe, very easy to listen to. However, with use on this film, there is yet more cheese! The final climax is boring and to be honest, you just want it to end! Half the dialogue used has more cheese than a lasagne! “Your eyes are so beautiful.” “That’s because they’re looking at you!” This film is NOT to be taken seriously, but even with that in mind, it’s hard to regard it as an enjoyable experience.

One thing the film does have working for it is it’s, surprisingly, un-predictable ending. I have to admit I didn’t see it coming!

Special Features

The special features consist of a standard trailer and making-of documentary. A pretty pathetic attempt really, I was hoping that the special features would make up for the rather lame film. Not so. Overall I would say a film only a girl could handle once, where as the blokes might be able to handle it a few more times, just for the eye candy. A disappointing result.

J.D. is a freelance writer who is currently doing research for a book on the films of Michael Mann. He likes reading anything written by Jack Kerouac, James Ellroy, J.D. Salinger, Harlan Ellison or Thomas Pynchon. J.D. is currently addicted to the T.V. series 24 and enjoys drinking a lot of Sprite. This is not a blatant plug for the beverage but if they ever decided to give him a lifetime supply he certainly wouldn’t turn them down.
view all DVD reviews by JD Lafrance

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